25 Years in Business

Hundreds of Parties...

You bet I’ve got a few tips...

Of Course, organising a party is s deeply personal thing, you know what you want and you know how much you can afford, but have you really thought about it.. Here’s a few pointers and tips that may save you a few grey hairs..

#1 Plan - Just enough. Over planning a party is worse than under planning, why? because you leave no flexibility for any unexpected event and you let your guard down.

#2 Invite 100, get 70 replies, expect 50. Seriously, a light rainfall can keep away 25% of your guests IF there’s something good on the TV, sure, they intend to come a little later but then they feel embarrassed about turning up late, so they stay at home.

#3 Book Quality not Quantity. How many times have you been to a party and seen tons of food left at the end? A HUGE function room for 30 guests or the loudest band in the UK, when all you want to do is talk to a distant relative. A better buffet for less people will still be enough, people crammed into a room that is not quite big enough has a fantastic atmosphere and I’ve NEVER heard anyone complain that the disco wasn’t loud enough.

#4 Know how many friends you have. This year I had a true first, a really lovely couple with “just a few friends” were expecting 30 people to turn up for a wedding breakfast buffet, the 90 people that actually turned up soon ate all the food and the evening function was the same with 150 guests keen to say well done to a truly lovely couple, devastating the buffet for 80. Five times a year I attend parties where the hosts are devastated at how few people turn up. The only answer is.. invite, check and double check. If the last 3 parties you have been to have been poorly attended, then learn from it, likewise if you are in the habit of not turning up to other peoples parties, they won’t turn up to yours.

#5 Keep it classy! Of course you’re not a snob but, your wedding reception is a chance to celebrate the most important day of your life at this joyous time, you can get drunk and throw up anytime. If you know mad uncle Bert will take off his trousers and dance on the table, and this isn’t what you want, TELL HIM and if he objects, don’t invite him, this is YOUR DAY. Fueding families should be kept apart and if this won’t work, keep them away. No birthday cake at all is better than a cheap tacky one from Aldi. Just make sure you avoid the “Beckhams” syndrome where everything is so classy, it’s actually quite awful.

#6 Communicate with everyone right up until the 11th hour, then relax. Have a clear idea yourself first, then communicate that idea with everyone, tell them once, then remind them the day before the party. If they cant grasp it the first time you tell them, get someone else. On the night you want to relax, last minute changes to plan just confuse everyone, as does drip feeding information to them, but worse, suppliers can’t plan and give you the service you deserve if they don’t know what you want.. On the night, you don’t want to be chasing around after the caterer, the DJ, the bars manager, they should already know what you want. and

#7 Talk to the engine driver, not the oily rag. You book a venue and they book a caterer and a disco and sort out the bar. How do you know that your important requests and instructions are getting passed on? Ask to talk to the caterer, ask the DJ to phone you and insist on a guarantee that the bar hours are as you have booked and he won’t run out of Ansells bitter, or whatever it is that YOU know many of your guests will drink. I stood in a room this year where 90% of the guests were Polish and I had no Polish music and the bar ran out of Vodka in ten minutes flat, the guests would have brought their own music had they known and the bar manager was left with the job of ringing round for some spirits. The organiser had spoken at some length with the hotel that had booked me about the requirement, but the secretary who only works in the mornings had said everything would be OK and not passed it on, because, she doesn’t have to face the angry customers.

#8 Write it down. A 20p notepad with all the details and contacts written in it will be worth 1000 times that amount if you need it at 7.30 on the night of the party, think I’m joking? I get between five and ten calls a year from people who can’t remember which disco they’ve booked - and they’re always on a Friday or Saturday night at 7.30pm

#9 Please Yourself. I did a party the other year for a lady who’s uncle didn’t like flashing lights, her auntie wanted to sit in front of the speaker but didn’t like loud music, her dad wanted only vegetarian food on the buffet and her mum took a dislike to the name of my Disco, could I take the fronts off the boxes? The entire venue, inside and outside, had to be no smoking a year before the ban kicked in and because someone’s brother was a vicar I couldn’t play any record with Gay, or sexual references. What sort of party do you suppose she had? You can’t please everyone and this is YOUR NIGHT so please yourself and if one oddball objects, then do you want them there anyway?, really, do you?

#10 Know when to say goodnight. You want your guests to go home buzzing don’t you, so why would you let six of them sit po-faced until 1AM, in a room with just the DJ, the Barmaid and yourself just because you’ve booked the room until 1? Is there anything worse than a wedding reception that fizzles out into sad, depressing foursome? Finish on a high, as soon as your guests start leaving in droves, it’s time for the last smoochie and away home. On the other side the best time to talk to the venue and the disco about the possibility of running over it the party’s still pumping at 1:00, is before the start. in 2007 we did a 2:00 finish that went on until 4 because the venue were up for it and we had been pre-warned - no haggling - no late night phone calls home and because we arranged it at lunchtime, the customer knew exactly how much more it was going to cost if it happened.

#11 Use professionals and let them excel. Here’s a strange one, nobody EVER books a 500 year old hotel for the wedding and asks them to put up a plastic sheet on the front to make it look modern, Nobody EVER orders a traditional wedding cake and asks the cook to bake it in a tandoori oven and add chicken livers to the mixture, that would be silly... Almost as silly as booking a Jazz band and dictating the music they play, or booking a party disco and insisting on reggae or R&B all night, or telling the head waiter to start serving desserts to the top table before the rest of the room has finished the soup.. and yet, every weekend, people do these things without a seconds thought. You want a funk band? BOOK a funk band, you want a reggae disco, book a reggae disco, you want a fast food service, tell the hotel to hire more staff for the event, you will pay for them, but you will get what you want.

#12 and finally BOOK A TAXI! No really, ask yourself now, do you want to be stood out in the rain waiting for a taxi at 1.30 in the morning? Book everyone else’s for the finishing time and yours for ten minutes later, and if you do finish early, most taxi firms will be delighted to bring it forward for you. Book about four for your guests and negotiate your own price for yours, try it, it works! And if you do get stuck and told you’ll have to wait, ask the landlord to book you a staff taxi, they’ll always be quicker than you booking your own.